Once again, love is in the air! Its hard to accept the fact but I think i know what love is when I feel it.

Haha, but dunno how long will it lask but hopefully it will last!

Well, that's the lovey dovey part but the problems are still the same, still no solutions are coming up for me to solve the problem. This is therefore getting reali problematic and I am getting real stressed up.

And now, my stupid com is infected with dunno what virus and now i dunno why i cant type properly! The letters are not coming up properly and i have to type and retype.

Ah well, its getting worst. haha. I'll update some day next time.

It's happiness that's filling and running thru my veins now.The feeling of having to relieve the pressure that's been piling up feels so good.

I never really thought it'd be this way but, thanks to my persistancy and hard work, it's finally working out well! It's just being very hopeful, but its a good hope to look forward to. People do say that don't place so much hope on something because if it turns out wrong then everything you had hoped for would just become pain and sorrows. Now i know why i'm always in pain!

It's reali quite tru that motivating you over and over agn doesnt reali help much, but what you do after a motivation speech to drive you on is vital. And I calculated that in about 1 and 1/2 months time I'll become a manger HOPEFULLY! haha.

Oh and what was surprising today was, my 4th generation downline had an appointment today. It was an ordinary distributor appointment, but the what was really unique about this prospect is that his family is FILTHY RICH!

He is so rich till his family need not work and just live off the bank's monthly interest. WOW! And he has like 6-7figures worth of money inside. SIMPLY AMAZING! I wished I was like that tooo..!

Ahh, well, its kinda fun having friends from RP, really cool people to be with. Altho i kinda miss my old friends, its been awhile since I last saw all of em! And the last I saw a part of them was at a gathering recently, but still, haven reali seen the whole bunch.

Well, I have to admit that life's liddat tho. Some come some go and how u accept it is what I wanna noe. Its like love though, they moments come and go like the wind. At first its strong, then it slowly weakens. How you maintain the strength of the wind is one problem, keeping it blowing is another.

I guess I'm never good at all this, and the best part of it is that I thought I was. Well, being egoistic cant get you far in a relationship, sometimes lowering yourself really helps. But then again will I lower myself? Hmm...

The nights are starting to become lonely again. Why is that I just can't let go of the activities that I have? It's a cause in my life that I am like this. Am I selfish or do I just want the better for myself and others? Questions love to fill my mind without solutions. I can never understand why I can't be like my cousins, free and easy-going, with no stress upon them, with nothing to worry about and with no love to ponder over. I am humane and sane like everyone else. But why am I so different from others? What makes me an outcast or someone special to others?

Is this life? Or is this just an imaginary feeling in which I can choose not to have? How come I feel better for others but not myself? I dunno if I am scared or just plainly choose to ignore these signs. I dunno.

Its getting late, and suddenly angers are flooding in again. One moment I was feeling like a bird, free from everything, thinking my problems are solved, and the next, after a conversation, the sudden burst of agony fills my blood. I guess, I should have never started anything. Now that I am too far in it, it's too late to turn back.

But why must I turn back when everytime I feel happiness building up when I am close to her? Why do I feel so good when I smell the rosy fragrance coming from her? Hmmm...I wish to answer those questions but I somehow feel that its all just a fake judgemental skills in which I am poor in. Maybe my feelings aren't true enough yet. Maybe I am not ready to accept it even when I thought I am, now, the only problem is.........

Well another beginning of another chapter in my life story is about to unfold, let us all turn the page.

Songs songs songs songs songs. I need to write songgggsss!!! Man, I'm getting bored with cover songs. Well, i have one song but its not that perfect. and i reali reali reali need to find a new melody for smth and someone special.

Its bored reali, playing the same old song and it will be even more boring when you only jam the same songs for weeks! Yea, true enough competition's coming up and we seriously need better songs for it in order to win. HOW? we have ONE MORE WEEK!

Ok, back from my stupid pause, damn! I got freaking squashed by the "BIG" boys from the class. Lionel, Sam, Alex...even Ishaq joined in! Dey, wat jiwa you talking about? haha. And in the stupid process, i think i hurt my ribs. Its freaking hurting right now as I type this. I'm never lying down in class anymore, its an un-called for decision for the boys to start "tao pok-ing" you. =_="

And WHYYYYY?

This stupid word has been spreading thru my mind like a mutated virus. The headaches and sleepless nights are making things worst for me. I don't understand how someone can fall for others without even considering factors....
It's just wrong. And not only is it wrong, but it feels weird too. I mean, find someone like yourself in the mirror! See the link? Damn it!

And now my stupid knee is hurting badly! From a stupid decision in which we made, by fighting over who goes first for their presentations, yea it's childish, I KNOW THAT! But that's about how my classmates and I are, CHILDISH! haha.

We're from 17-20, and like a number of years have passed by at the same time leaving our childhood days behind, so is it wrong to bring back our lost childhoods? Go figure.

What pisses me off the most is that some people doesn't appreciate it. Ok maybe the word "appreciate" is a wrong word but what else can i replaced that word with? I mean if I'm childish, so be it, that's just me, am I always THAT childish? If I am, when? If you say all the time then justify it, I just hate it when people start to act all mature and all, you can be mature soon but please don't act so mature! Why waste your youth when you still can live it.

Some people claim that it's because it's embarrassing but then again I wonder, when kids are kids, do you think they're embarrassed with what they do? I agree that they're kids so they have every rights to be childish but come on la, we're young adults, mind you, YOUNG adults so we are still entitled to some childish-ness.

Well, I'm getting freakingly tired suddenly, must be because of the sudden rush of energy to the mind, or because I hardly had a fruitful sleep. I sure need to get some sleep, but fuck, I can't sleep! Must be some problems that's making me like this.

I seriously sometimes don't wish to sleep. Just wanna live through the night. The night's short, whyy waste it with sleep? When you can occupy it with some fun and entertainment.

Then again, you need people who are like me to do that. But how many people are like that?

I wonder.....

Sigh! Why is that this world is full of problems? What has problems got to do with life? How does it freaking help you in this world?

People say, solvong problems help builds your experience, but I do realize one thing is that whenever you solve a problem, another problem arises, and its seemingly harder to solve it. So then, I wonder, is it worth solving anything at all?

This morning was kinda funny. I remember setting my alarm at 6am, the reason why I wanted to wake up early is cause I made a promise to someone but somehow, I cuden stay awake, instead, woke up at 8am instead! DAMN..! there goes another one. haha.

And seemingly when I thought I was gonna be the only one reaching school late, Lionel suddenly msged me to meet him at BK, so haha, I thought mayb I had someone to go to school with. Ok, this may sound weird but, haha, I like going school with someone, and I suddenly realized that I never fail to meet someone before I go to school, and this happened from the day I started school till now. LOL. I guess, I'm not cut out to be alone. haha.

And then came first break out, whoa! Fun time once again, haha! This time we had JD to go along with our breakfask, ok so some of you reading this would probably go: " why you guys drinking in the morning?!?!" lol, dun ask me but I can honestly tell you, drinking in the morning helps kick start the day.

Ask Nicole and she definitely will agree with me. She went SUPER HIGH! lol, desmond was on the verge of going bonkers, and ok, lionel, dunno what happened to him, Ishaq and me still hanging on but somehow I know I was becoming high...

Yea, well, so science today, freaking boring..! What heat la, what cold water la, sigh I wished I was on holiday.

Anyway, I'm already beginning to miss my life....

Vengeance i dare say is indeed a painless pleasure.

I don't understand you. At first I thought it was me who was pulling the strings, but no, in turn i realize YOU are the one that's making fine decisions. What is it that you want badly from me? I don't get it, I'm lost...someone please help me?!

Family problems isn't the best to encounter at all, but it does happens. People say that problems, fights arguments all happen because of love, hah! I doubt this family does. Hmmm..what's love when your dad hits you till you bleed like a dog? What's love when your mother decides to take you to the police just because they can't settle some fucking small matter?

I don't understand them at all, they said I'm stupid but hey, I'm smart enough to fool them for about 2months before they found out. haha. But ok, I mean I have to admit, in Singapore it's never easy to get away with situation which you put yourself in. Like how does one get himself away from a murder case? I doubt that'll ever happen in Singapore.

But I ain't saying I was involve in a murder case la, you gotta be kidding me if you did believe that, I just got into some shit with my parents about certain family issues and now here I am, sitting down, wishing I could jus take the lift up and DIE!

Why does life have to be soooo bloody complicated? Why can't it just allow me a simple life in which I can lead happily, without having the idea of being accused or hurt badly!

Maybe some of you have the answer to the question, but I regard this one as a retorical question. So save it!

Today was ok, in a sense that I think I could jus make it on time for some stuffs in which I needed to do. I don't quite understand how everyone feels whenever I talk to them about how I feel.

I don't noe if you feel my pain, and furthermore, if you were in my shoes, what the fuck will you do?

I'm still lost for words and answers. This are just some things in which I would never wanna find out so soon. I just want time and space and to forget all miseries in which I know would go unresolved.

I just want my own life back....

Another one bites the dust. Well, till now I never knew what that meant really cos I haven been asking anyone about what that reali means. Hah. But who cares?

Okok, well, class seems to be getting reali closer together. We went bowling together at Safra country club, boy, was it funny. Its really a fucking good way to relief stress. Haha. See all the funny bowling styles, making me feel reali reali good. But then again there’s still people trying to make me fucking pissed off with them. I dunno why but I get reali agitated by some people.

K whatever, at least this morning I was late for school. Kinda feels good to be late. It’s been like awhile to be late. Haha. I can have a later sleep in + my rest is finally good and sufficient. Haha.

Today I finally went back to sports school, and it was reali reali weird. I kinda missed the school in some ways. And its reali awesome to feel like im someone in that school, to have made an impact to like know everyone from the school. Haha.

Nothing much reali happened today jus that my stupid stomach feels reali reali weird this morning. Like there were knives cutting thru my internal organs, making me feel weak and vulnerable. I felt this way before but it wasn’t as severe as it happened this morning. I dunno what’s wrong but when I started walking it hurts agn. The pain is so unbearable till I cant even stand upright! I only can squat and wait for the pain to go away!

AHHH! Someone please kill me! Haha. If you could feel my pain then he anger will go away making me feel alive. The sorrows vanquish in thin air bringing back the happiness. The sun shines through the clear blue skies.

I am as happy as a lark, but how long will this happiness last…….?

I can never understand why there’s so much hate in this world! How can someone find love when the 1st feeling they feel is hate? A story that goes about on how ppl would see it, is probably the only one where you would say ppl find love 1st then hate, but then again why does the word keeps coming back?

Will there ever be love again? If there is a thing called love then why do I feel a painful sensation whenever I am in love? Why does everyone love the hate and hate the love? Why not spread love evenly without the pain?

I would always try and understand how each individual feels but that’s making me an emotional kid, but sometimes I wanna ask those mother fuckers who label me how do they categorize emo kids; by how they’re able to feel for one another??? Fuck this life. I dunno how its considered life when you’re suppose to feel happy, I don’t, all I fucking feel is hate, hate hate hate! Never for once will I feel a solid liking in which I deserve to feel.

Negative comments sure help strengthen someone’s heart but we aren’t deaf, we’re still humans. We can feel, and you faggots out there who dispises us im sure you’re jus full of hatred which you cant release on your on. Take it out and you think it’s a good thing, but what else are you suppose to do? Some may us, I can never understand how you ever know how to decides what’s hate or whether u should bottle it all up.

I respect those who keep things to themselves, they receive all the hurt and hate that’s been thrown at them because honestly that’s how I am. I keep everything bottled up, but when I unleash, a lot of ppl wuden like it.

I cry myself to slp sometimes jus thinking of the pressure that kicks in.

At times, I feel like dying, and i wondered to myself why am I living? Why cant God jus take my life now, wait, is God actually there to hear me out? Does he answers to my prayer whenever I ask for something? Some ppl tells me that God shows you the solution indirectly but seriously, I am too tired to think about the solutions and how it may help me. I jus 1 a straight solution to help me make my life realistic and happy.

I am living in a world full of feelings, if I was immune to all the negative feelings then I might as well be dead. I hate showing it out but somehow I cant jus keep everything to myself. I know sometimes a man has to stand out and show his manly character but like I said earlier, we’re still humans, we have feelings and we can express it, its jus how you do it. I choose to pen it down, but then again I cant write everything out, this jus sucks.

I wanna cry again but wats the use? The feelings would only go away temporarily, once the tears stop coming, everything is thrown back at you so suddenly that you dunno what hit you. Its like knocking yourself against the wall so hard you dun even noe what your hitting.

I’d rather be paralyzed, to not feel anything is the best. I jus want my life to be smooth but then again is it possible? Fuck it….

I’m not gonna ans it, go screw it and find out.

Another 3D2N camp finally came to a full stop. And this time round it wasn’t as great as the previous camp that I went. Anyway, it was kind of cool to be able to finally know your classmates reali well. I guess there were those who were reali weird and some that I would have never imagine them to be. But it was alright, at least I made LOADS of new friends. Haha. At least this camp was organized by students and so, most of them, no in fact all of them had the same “mentality” like us. Basically they’re jus a yr or 2 older than us but doesn’t mean being old by a few years makes any difference.

It doesn’t mean they have to more mature than us haha, cos there are some who are reali childish, to the point where you cant believe that they’re actually 20 behaving like a 12 years old kid. Haha. Yea, that’s life when you’re reali enjoying it, wanna relive the younger days again I suppose. Haha.

Ok so I reali did have fun at camp, but I swear the activities were a bore, I had fun hanging with my friends and making new friends, this was the fun thing about my camp, getting to noe new friends, other than that, it was rather weird and boring.
And we made the camp become a chalet, where everyone gathered in this freakingly huge hall so we sorta occupied the perimeter of the hall, and the middle was left to do activities like soccer, rugby, dancing, fighting and even tao pok-ing! Lol. I daresay the “night life” is better than any oder camps that I’ve been too. But hah! What do you expect from organizers who are 14 years old at heart?

Games are also lame, even if you ask a 14 year old kid to take part, he’d say its lame too. Haha. And best of all, im suffering from my sunburn now, went to sentosa at arnd 10++am and stayed till 9pm. And I swear the afternoon sun’s a KILLER! Fello killed those poor Chinese and ang mo kids, turning them from white and yellow to tomato red, not cos of embarrassment but you know why la. Haha

And us Malays and Indians weren’t so bad, at least you got burnt but not turned redish, hehe. It goes out to Kristine(esp. you!), Geraldine, and Simin, NICE “ROSY” cheeks girls :D haha!

Well, enough’s said, im gonna turn in now, din sleep for two freaking nights straight so im gonna catch up with slp now! Toodles y’all!

I seriously want to know who said that life was easy. Easy comes in many ways like being able to do something and able to understand what you’re doing is easy. Yea, I do agree to that statement but then again, how many things that I do needs some time to understand? Well, almost EVERYTHING that I do needs time for understanding. Haha.

Like take my job for example, I would confidently say that my company’s easier than all other MLM companies outside simply because we don’t deal like those losers in selling products but more specifically, we sell plans. I know this may seem ridiculous but tell me, if selling of your companies platform can earn you up to 7-figure incomes, then why do other MLM company where you earn at most a bare minimal of 8k. Sad isn’t it? But to those who want to “save face” will then comment and say, “Hey look, it’s not as easy as you think! How many people are willing to buy plans instead of products?”

Sigh, it’s really up to them to decide what future they want. Well, my future is set in networking, simply because I gain new friends fast, I gain experience and business knowledge fast! Even the greens are rolling in like nobody’s business. Well in fact it IS nobody’s business, I EARNED it! Haha. Ok so now for those of you who are reading this, you think that hmm, maybe this dude’s right about one thing, about the his company beating the other companies. Well for one, I would proudly say that yes, my company’s 1000x better than those outside fools. Haha. And 2, I am still open for people who are willing to join me; I’m giving you all a chance to do so.
I don’t want to be regarded as selfish, self-centered and a bloody rich jock, but rather I still want to extend out my reach to others, like all my close buddies and friends. I mean, guys, I rather we grow and earn together. Come on, opportunities are regrets, but it’s up to each individual to decide what an opportunity is.

For example, let’s say you decide to turn down this opportunity saying that MLM companies cannot make it in the future, and you decide to work very super hard for you future, and you end up competing for jobs in the future among all the other workers. And one day when you see me driving pass you in my luxurious cars and you see me stay in one of those luxurious house, and you go like, “I wished I had join you…” well, I can truly tell you that, even if you are my friend I won’t welcome you anymore, for a very simple reason, why do I accept those who had stop me against my will.

I want supporters like those in my network, and now I am not driving, I don’t have a house, so it’s still possible to join. Give me a ring and I will fill you in on the details. Toodles!