When life just seems to go your way, it will suddenly come to a standstill or even take a turn in which you never expected. That's how life just seemed to be...

Last night I was in bed thinking about how my life just sped by without me knowing how fast it would be and how seriously old im growing into. Its already 2009 and Im freaking 18 this year with a second year to study at RP and of course to complete some achievements for this year.

And just recently, i was looking through posts that were typed out and publish about how I went through my past and how childish i'd been then. But now, seeing the changes in my attitude and the changes in my thinking, i guess growing up was exactly fun afterall. I went through my pictures as well when i was in sports school and it was kinda funny to see me in my younger days. It was exhilarating.

But what made me decide to post this is cos of a dream i had last night. I dreamt i went on a holiday with some friends and sadly, we were kidnapped and held hostage for about a week before i saw each and everyone of my friends died due to the torture of the rebels. but the funny thing was this, they could have retaliated and fought back before dying, but they didn't and instead just stood there waiting to die, with smiles on their faces. It was both a sad and happy sight and of course, I was the last to go; with a bullet through my head.

And of course it was a dream. But the dream had a meaning to it. It goes like this that you have one shot at life, and if you don't treasure the moment, the fun, the happiness, the sadness, and the love, you'll never get to enjoy what life truly is. And when it comes to the final moment of your last breath, you'd suddenly realize that you haven achieve what you wanted to do and that's when you start panicking and beg to live on...

I have wishes and I would like to have one wish that would hopefully come true. I wish to be a happy teen for as long as my teenage years allow me to and i wished that this wished would come true after i end this post.

But no matter if it doesnt.

Life is full of wonders and surprises, I just hope my life doesnt take a wrong turn again...

dead blog dead blog, its beginning to sound like madshit dead, madshit dead. haha. Random shit. ah, well, im bored and feeling tired but cant really get any shut eye actually.

well, not much interesting thing happened ever since the day of my birth till now. just some random events that's been happening and a cute incident that happened ytd at powerhouse. okay well, so we all over reacted by a bit! haha.

well, now it some how seems to voice down to a meer thing which is making me feel like shit or rather feel empty inside.

I guess i just missed the time when im loving someone or rather someone loving me at the same time. Well, most people would agree with me that parent's love are the best but at times i beg to differ. But who knows which you choose would be great for you. some say, parents, others tell you affection but then you decide what's best for yourself.

anyhow, although i dun show it that often or rather my ego denies my action of feeling lonely and wanting to love someone again. Somehow I'm saving it for the best girl out there but till today there's only one and that one doesn't seem to be reacting much to the situation. well, i dun really wanna ask much of it or from her. after all, i love being frens with her and to stay happy with her is indeed good enough. but still, i want to go back to the days where i could hold her and she would lie on my shoulders and say words that would make my day.

but then again, everyone chooses their own paths to walk on, forcing it would mean harm and chaos which no one would like to have. I wanna protect her but no, i have to stay true to my agreement with her. It shouldn't be the case of a cowardly act but instead to be a man and stand by my words.

See, i agree that when you look at couples in the streets these days you would envy them and sometimes wonder why not me? but i keep telling myself that one day people would envy me instead, it keeps me going. Well, being single is fun but when you used to come from a background that you're always involve in a relationship, you will tend to have the urge to want someone by ur side again.

That's what's happening to me now but im only 18, its still a long way to go before i will decide who will be my life long partner. well, enjoy the days while i still can cos who knows, one day, life would just turn around and go the way i want it to. :)

happy birthday here, happy birthday there. haha. well, thanks everyone for wishin me and a special thanks to madhu, sarah, kaixin, leo and zach as well, to make my day quite memorable in a way. ;P

well, finally 18 and now i get to do things legally without having to shy away from the law. and I celebrated my 18th one with a difference this year.

Usually i'd hold parties and all for my friends but im thinking maybe this year, i'd do something different. And so i called a few close friends down tgt and we had drinks to celebrate the event.

But, before the big day, I went to sentosa with sarah for a tanning session and she gave me my present there. quite cool, choco liquors. hee. but yea, im done finishing it anyway. haha.

okay then so midnight came and it was funny, cos the only person who was first to wish me a happy birthday was sarah and god! i seriously miss her. and so for a second birthday prezzie, was a kiss from her. and damn, it felt good wen our lips connected! haha. okay so madhu zach and kx got me a curtain for my room which is weird but okay! haha. and instead of the usual cake with frostings and candles, they got me a cheese cake with biscuit sticks as candles. haha. unique huh?

but since u only get to celebrate once in a year, so its okay to come up with stupid things for once.

well, so we all got wasted over JD and mixers and it was indeed funny to see everyone high. haha. well, and since everyone was high, words and truths seems so reliable and easy to believe.

anyway, I still love her and somehow, i feel like getting back with her. but see, its not easy and im not really looking for anyone right now or a relationship.

im getting sleepy now, will update again soon. so yea, i'll be back before you know it.hahah